Archive for September, 2010

Rednecks Need Love Too

September 17th, 2010

Yesterday, I was involved in a road rage incident with Rohan in the car.  It was one of those things that blew up from nothing and quickly turned a bit frightening.  I had the right of way, someone gunned it at the last second, cut me off and I almost hit him.  I quickly beeped my horn at him and, as a result, Bubba stopped his huge SVU in the MIDDLE of traffic.  Just stopped.  Since his car was 9 ft off the ground with his “I’M INSECURE” massive tires and his windows were black, I had no idea what he was doing so I waited a minute, backed up and then started to go around.  Well, of course, he gunned it to the other lane when I did that and almost hit me.  Again.

Did I mention how much I dislike rednecks?

I waited.  He stayed in that lane so I passed and, of course, we ended up at a red light right next to one another.  I heard him yelling and had a huge lapse in judgement and, for some reason, decided to try and reason with Bubba.  All I cared about was him screaming profanities that my son could hear, so I rolled my window a little and pointed at my son and said something along the lines of “Be quiet.  There is a child in this car” yada yada.  What I really wanted to do was offer him some free dental work after I punched him in the face.  I kid, I kid.  I would’ve kicked him.  He only had seven teeth left in his head anyway.

Anyhow, he did actually shut up for a sec when he saw who I was pointing at, but then he kept yelling so I rolled up my window, turned the radio up and instructed Rohan to look out the other window.  I’m a city girl so immediately assumed this stellar example of humanity was going to follow us and harm us so I was pretending to drive while singing loudly with Taio Cruz to distract Rohan…all the while checking my rearview mirror like a felon in a car chase.

Apparently, Bubba had a KKK rally to get to because he did not follow us but I was pretty shaken, as was Rohan.  I immediately explained to him that I was actually trying to talk to that man but, sometimes, people don’t want to talk and just want to yell and be right and you need to learn to just walk away, which is why I rolled the window up.

Ro:  Why was he so angry though?

Me:  Good question, buddy.  Sometimes people get angry over one thing, but it’s really over something else that happened at another time.  They are sad and don’t know how to deal with the feelings, so they get REALLY angry REALLY fast over something silly.  I am sorry you had to see that though.  I learned my lesson.  Next time I will not even roll the window down because the best thing to do in situations like that is to ignore them.

Ro:  *pause*  Maybe he didn’t get love from his mommy and daddy when he was little.  Maybe he had a really hard time when he was a kid so that’s why he’s so mean now.

Be still my heart.  I LOVE MY BOY.  He has the most tender heart (yes, I know what you are thinking…where did he get that?)  and I am so blessed by this little being who constantly gives me much needed perspective.  Who knew I could learn so much from a six year old?

Apparently, God did.

Posted in Parenting | Comments (2)

House = WIN, Furnishings = FAIL

September 2nd, 2010

Lots to love about this house. I would live there if you asked me. However, I can’t help but feel that the owners forked over a ton of dough to get this amazing piece of property so they could have that view….and then ran out of money and had to use Aunt Verna’s sofa / chair set thing circa 1979 and Uncle Kanye’s coffee table circa 1985.

The dining table and chairs are great and I love ‘em but the incongruency is killing me. The sofa / big chair / whatever-it-is looks like it should be sitting on orange shag carpeting  and reeking of da herb and, by the looks of the cushions, it hosted many a hippie. The mobile coffee table looks like it should be sitting across from a plastic covered sofa “leased” from Rent-To-Own and across from a bookshelf made of shiny peach laminate. I like to think that, at one time, it had legs but they morphed slowly over time into wheels because they are trying to get away from that sofa.

And the vases (that’s “vah-zyz” when you have this much money) full of cut flowers? I assume that their local hospital had to get rid of some extra arrangements that patients left behind. I only hope the part of the dining table not pictured doesn’t have yet two more. Perhaps they just never want dinner guests and completely covering the expanse of wood is their passive aggressive way of suggesting you don’t hint at a dinner invitation.

Deep thoughts by Jessica Thompson

(photo credit: Humberto Hermeto)

Posted in Design, Laugh | Comments (0)